By Whitney Dean
In 2001, my best friend, Karin, and I were at a punk rock show in Orlando, Florida. During the lull before the headliners came on stage to perform, a drunken man stumbled down the stairs to the pit area and began harassing us. I don’t remember the nature of the harassment, but it solicited a verbal warning from me to back off, which was met with a punch to my face by an unknown assailant, which in turn attracted the attention of the bouncers, who proceeded to kick me out of the show.
It all felt very unfair.
And this is what I think of every time I hear “No rep!” uttered from the mouth of a judge during a competition. “But I just got punched in the face” feels remarkably similar to “But I just did one-hundred wall-balls.” I want to say, “yes, I did the thing I’m not supposed to do, but given the context of the situation, and if you’d just consider, for a moment, the circumstances under which I’m operating, you’d see…” But there’s no time for all of that and no one is listening anyhow. Life is moving on and moving on fast. The next movement needs to be judged; the show must go on.
And doesn’t it all feel so judgmental?
I do have a few things going for me in the depression department, however. As a human who struggles relentlessly with feeling low down and no good, I seem to have evaded the arrogance of believing I’m perfectly fine as is. I may be hard on myself, but at least there’s room to grow, there. As a culture, we hold depression in a very dark light, and even though we all suffer from the emotional mire at some time or another, it’s treated as a state of mind to “get over” and get over quick; be done with it before it does you in. I think this is shortsighted. There’s a lot of introspection and meditation that comes from depression, and I’d just as soon let it ride beside me than leave it on the curb where I can learn nothing from it, as though it’s beneath me.
The grace of all great sadness is humility, and its been those moments of humility where I’ve experienced the most growth as a person, an animal, a friend, a daughter. I really want to be a better athlete because I know I’ve got a long way to go. I really want to be trustworthy and reliable because I know that’s a privilege that’s earned, not granted. I really need to toughen up physically and psychologically because I’ve worked hard for my scars, and they remind me of how far I’ve come.
And what does this all have to do with wall-balls? Well, just take the no-rep. Go be a better athlete with a deeper sense of purpose. Go commune with pain and frustration and come out the other end a little stronger and more centered. Drop below parallel, pull your chin over the bar, lock out your arms in that snatch, and count the one burpee you may or may not have already counted.
Do these things or it’s a “No Rep.”
1x20 HBBS add 5#
4x10 Strict pull ups or 5 negatives or 10 ring rows
15 Chest to bar pull-ups
8 Bear complexes 135/95#
15 C2B pull ups
(1 Bear complex is: Power clean front squat + push press to behind the neck + back squat + push press back to front)